Another idiot with an agenda.

I came across this petition today:
http://www.petitiononline.com/nomaddox/petition.html

Basically it was thrown together by a close-minded ignoramus who is unhappy with the content of the following website:
http://maddox.xmission.com

I have been visiting "The Best Page in the Universe" for some time now, and I find Maddox to be rather amusing. Sometimes childish, but still fun to read. And being the "Crusader for Free Speech" that I am, I decided to write her a little email:



Dear Beth Robbins,

I came across a link to your site on www.fazed.net (and maddox.xmission.com), and I must say that I haven't had a laugh like that since the petition to stop teenage masturbation made its way around the Internet.

Let me bring a little something to your attention. There's this nifty little bill out there, perhaps you have heard of it? If not, let me fill you in on the very first part:

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances."

So, you found something you don't agree with, eh? Welcome to Life 101. One of the wonderful things about this country is that we all have not just the ability, but the RIGHT to speak our minds, as the paragraph above clearly states. Maddox does just that. He speaks his mind, inserting things like humor and satire (are you familiar with either of these?) into his posts, and unfortunately, close-minded people like yourself tend to miss the point.

The same bill that allows Maddox to write whatever he wants also gives YOU the freedom to write whatever you want about Maddox. Kind of a catch-22, eh? The same bill that gives him the freedom to speak his mind gives you the freedom to speak out against him. If you succeed in shutting down "The Best Page in the Universe", who's to say that YOU won't be the next target? Did you ever stop and think that there may be a petition out there to shut down Mothers Against Maddox? Pick up a dictionary, look up "Irony", and let me know what it says.



I thought I would quote directly from your main page.

"I no longer allow my children to connect to the Internet without my supervision, because I do not want them to view such trash on the web, that promotes hate, suicide, violence, and bad-attitude."

Well, better turn off the radio! I'd hate for your child to stumble across Rush Limbaugh by mistake. He might pick up some hateful values from there.

Keep a close eye on that library card. Your son might go and check out a book like "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer". He might pick up horrible words, like "nigger"! No wait, he can pick that up from television, magazines, radio and, well, just by walking down the street, listening to people talk.

Cancel your cable! The Soprano's said "Fuck" on HBO!! HERESY!!!

Throw away all your newspapers. Your son might read something unpleasant about the torture happening at Abu Ghraib, or the war in Iraq.

No more Presidential Addresses for you! You might be subjected to outright lies!

Damn, it sucks that the WTC was attacked; you were FORCED to watch that unpleasantness that ended up promoting "hate, suicide, violence and bad-attitude" And that's just within our government alone!

Here's an idea. Ship all the minorities to a different continent, then we won't have to hear racial epithets being used on a daily basis. That's a reasonable solution to the problem, right?


You are an extremely narrow-minded and naive woman. Society has been dealing with idiots like yourself for decades. You're not the first imbecile to attempt to impose your will on the rest of us. People have been doing it for YEARS. And without much success, might I add *coughcoughPROHIBITIONcoughcough*.

It's the bible-thumping do-gooders like you that make day-to-day living a hassle. If you don't like Maddox, DON'T GO TO HIS SITE! If you don't want your child being "corrupted" by the unspeakable evil that is Maddox, then block his access to the site. Or better yet, how about you take the time to fill your child's head with meaningful values, instead of recycled hatred?

Instead of lowering yourself to the level of Maddox, may I suggest that you take the noble approach and IGNORE him? It's kind of like television. If you don't like what is on, change the channel. Don't picket the station. If you don't like a particular book, put it down and don't read it. What you are doing is taking the book outside with the rest of your Nazi cohorts, and burning them, in hopes that no one will ever be befouled with the horrid stench of personal opinion.

By taking the time to create this petition and run this site, you are showing that you have nothing better to do with your time than complain about how someone else is living their life.

**NEWS FLASH**

Not everyone thinks the way you do! Get used to it! You find Maddox offensive? Well, I personally find you and your twisted, pseudo-Christian mentality to be a bigger plague on the Internet than Maddox ever could be.

I would like to suggest a book to you. It's called "1984", and it is by a very talented writer named George Orwell. You should check it out sometime, you might learn a thing or two from it (nah, who am I kidding, it will go straight over your head like most of this email will). If you don't have the time to read that book, let me suggest "Fahrenheit 451" by Ray Bradbury (Not to be confused with Fahrenheit 9/11 by Michael Moore).

Take some time to read those two books; better yet, why don't you sit down with your son and read them together, and then discuss the stories with him? Then you'll not only be expanding your mind, but showing your children that you care about them enough to spend time with them, and best of all, you'll show your son that you're not the lunatic parent/typical smothering mother who has too much time on her hands, and not enough common sense in her head.

There are many sites out there that are way more offensive and disgusting than "The Best Page in the Universe". I won't list them here, because all you'll do is start another on line petition, but at least take a look at http://ogrish.com. The things they show there are REAL FUCKING LIFE, and although you might be able to persuade someone to change their mind about something, you can't change the fact that horrible shit happens every day, no matter how much you would like to believe it doesn't.

This isn't 1942 anymore. Why don't you come back to reality, and leave the whining and complaining to the mindless drones who are seasoned at it, like Billy Graham or Pat Robertson.

Oh, and if you have a chance, please visit my site.
http://ekupes.blogspot.com

I'm sure you'll find something very offensive in there, like my complaints about 9/11, and now, YOU.

Thanks for your time, and have a TOLERANT day.

-tcl





Of course, her server was overloaded, and the email was bounced back to me. So I took it one step further. I created an online petition against Beth Robbins. It can be found below:

http://www.petitiononline.com/REHAB/petition.html

In case you don't want to go to the link, here is what the petition consists of:

This is a petition created by The Cunning Linguist, founder of Rational Everyday Humans Against BethRobbins (REHAB). The self-proclaimed "Mother Against Maddox" (http://MothersAgainstMaddox.cjb.net)is run by a disturbed, close-minded, pathetic religious zealot, otherwise known as Beth Robbins. Her website is giving children and weak-minded adults the wrong ideas about life, and the world we live in. The more support REHAB gains from intelligent, open-minded supporters of Free Speech, the better chance we have to shut her sick, distorted and dangerously naive site down.

Beth is an extremely half-baked jejune "human being" and her ego and sense of self-rightousness grows as the number of half-wits that get lured into her site increase. By using her twisted and immature "thoughts", she tricks people into believing her hateful, biased, hypocritical and simple-minded opinions about people, the Orwellian world she would like to live in, and life as she sees it.

I discovered her website when I found myself googling "Idiot". I was shocked to find out that my she has been promoting this site on a constant basis, for nearly a year. Ever since I started going to her website, I noticed an increase in my hatred towards certain groups of people and her puerile attitude towards life. I no longer visit her site, because I do not want to view such trash on the web; trash that promotes hate, childish behavior, suppression of the Bill of Rights, and fanatical anti-free speech attitude.

To see more examples of harmful content on Beth's website, visit http://MothersAgainstMaddox.cjb.net.

Stop Beth from brainwashing any more of our children and promoting abolishment of the First Amendment on the internet! Every signature this petition receives makes a difference in the fight against Beth. Help Rational Everyday Humans Against BethRobbins win this fight. Sign our petition, or send a supporting email to REHABPetition@gmail.com!


Sincerely,

The Undersigned



So, do me a favor, and sign this petition. Stop ignorant human beings like Beth Robbins from destroying what may very well be the final medium of Free Speech out there.

Thanks for your time, and if you have any questions about this petition, please email me at:
REHABPetition@gmail.com.