Wednesday, September 29, 2004

Convoluted Perceptions

My photo blog is now online. Visit Convoluted Perceptions at http://ekupics.blogspot.com. I have linked the site under both "Shameless Self Promotion" and "Attack of the Blogs", located in the sidebar.

Give it a look, feel free to comment and let me know what you think. I'm no professional; I don't really have a specific style (at least not that I am aware of), I just try to capture everyday items and events from a somewhat different perspective.

So go! View! Enjoy!


*thanks to Tony H. for the headers on both sites.

Be fair to the illegals!

Boo Hoo. Now the illegal Mexican immigrants are bitching because they are getting deported when caught in a DUI checkpoint. Just another example of how we are trashing the rights of our citizens in order to appease the non-citizens.

Makes sense, right? Right??

"These checkpoints make peoples lives miserable, not make them safer," said Jesus Rodriguez of Oakland Community Organizations, which filed most of the complaints about the checkpoints. "I've watched while the police have towed away cars (full) of groceries, leaving children crying on the sidewalk."

OK, here's an idea. Apply for citizenship. Apply for a drivers license. Get car insurance. Shut your goddamn complaint-hole! I don't care if you get towed, what about all the US Citizens who are getting towed with groceries in their car and children left on the street? Who is going to fight for them?

Oh that's right. NO ONE. Here's my thoughts. If you are here in this country illegally, you run a risk of being deported every day, whether or not there's a DUI checkpoint. To request that the Mexican community be notified about future checkpoints is about as smart as calling up all the bars and telling the drunken patrons where the checkpoint will be. Stop asking for special rights and privilege. You're here in AMERICA. Your rules no longer apply. Either get with the program, learn our language and do things the way we do them, or get the FUCK out! You don't like us pulling you over and asking for proof of insurance? Tijuana is right across the border, holmes. Hop into your dropped Ford F-150, and take yourself, your 13 children and your Nike Swooshes back to Mexico.

Thnik that's racist? Wrong again. It's called tough love. Too bad for you if you don't agree.

WELCOME TO AMEXICA!!

World-o-meter

World-o-meter

Every wondered what the population of the world was? Or how many newspapers were printed this year? Total Poo Tonnage? How much coal is burned? Daily deaths vs. daily births?

It can all be found at World-o-meter. Cool stuff.

Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Have you ever had an assortment of chocolates? Don't you hate trying to figure out which one of those candies is filled with caramel, and which one is the sour quince log? Well, wonder no more.

The Squiggle Code



Bush's signing of the Partial Birth Abortion Ban Act was a political triumph for the movement to curtail abortions in the U.S. What do you think?

"They've got God on their side. All we've got is science and reason."
-- the Onion

That's gotta burn.

Bush's Hometown Newspaper Endorses Kerry.

CRAWFORD, Texas (Reuters) - The newspaper in President Bush (news - web sites)'s adopted hometown of Crawford threw its support on Tuesday behind Bush's Democratic rival, Sen. John Kerry (news - web sites).

The weekly Lone Star Iconoclast criticized Bush's handling of the war in Iraq (news - web sites) and for turning budget surpluses into record deficits. The editorial also criticized Bush's proposals on Social Security (news - web sites) and Medicare.

"The publishers of The Iconoclast endorsed Bush four years ago, based on the things he promised, not on this smoke-screened agenda," the newspaper said in its editorial. "Today, we are endorsing his opponent, John Kerry."

It urged "Texans not to rate the candidate by his hometown or even his political party, but instead by where he intends to take the country."

Bush spends many of his weekends and holidays at his Crawford, Texas, ranch.

The Iconoclast's publisher and editor-in-chief, W. Leon Smith, said the newspaper is sent to Bush's ranch each week. "But I don't know if he reads it," Smith said.

The Kerry campaign welcomed the endorsement in an email to reporters.

Bargain Bin

I usually despise Wal-Mart. I do my best not to shop there for a number of reasons. Mainly because I don't like being in that close a proximity to masses of unwashed white trash and their ratty, unkempt redneck spawn. I also try to stay away from them because of purely ethical reasons, but that's a different rant (just for fun, did you know that Wal-Mart accounts for 10% of our economy? Scary, huh? If they were to go under, we would be screwed).

Yesterday I ventured into this squalid pit of horror because my girlfriend needed hair dye. I tagged along out of boredom, but that boredom vanished as soon as I set foot into the store. There, next to the Express Checkout lanes, was a huge bin of DVD's. Not just DVD's, but DISCOUNTED DVD's. Now, I am a sucker for a deal, (I'll buy stuff I don't need if the deal is good enough) and the idea of picking up some movies for 5 bucks each made me forget about the hillbilly hell that surrounded me. I walked over to the enormous bin, and dove in.

I HIT PAYDIRT!

Amidst the Care Bear movies and copies of Underdog episodes, I came across, and bought the following (I just linked to Amazon because I didn't take pictures of my bounty):

The Great White Hype. No one else seems to find this movie funny, but I love it.

The Frogs starring Sam Elliott. It's a great 'B' movie based on The Birds by Alfred Hitchcock, except with (duh) Frogs.

2 Alfred Hitchcock DVD sets:
Thrillers, which consists of "The Man Who Knew Too Much", "The Lady Vanishes" and "Secret Agent"

Montage of Mysteries, which consists of "Rich and Strange", "The Thirty Nine Steps" and "Young and Innocent".

The Fighting Fists of Bruce Lee. It contains "Fists of Fury", "Touch of Death" and "The Real Bruce Lee". VERY happy to find this one for so cheap, especially since it is 3 movies in 1.

The Terror/Little Shop of Horrors double disc set, starring Jack Nicholson.

The Three Stooges. 4 shorts, plus some added footage. Good times. Nyuk nyuk nyuk!

And the crowning glory:
Plan 9 From Outer Space!!! Oh yes, Ed Wood! The Worst Movie Ever Made!!

As you can tell, I love cheesy movies. I also love bargain shopping. I can spend an entire weekend going from garage sale to antique shop to Saver's to pawn shops and then on to eBay. The truth of the matter is, I get probably 70% of my furniture, decor and kitschy items at these places. I'm just one of the lucky people who likes what everyone else hates, whether it be music, movies or books. I just have odd (or eclectic, if you prefer) tastes. Kind of like fellow blogger Kirk Kitsch.

To sum things up, I spent under 30 bucks and got a weeks worth of entertainment, and some gifts for a few people. Not bad at all.

M.C. Escher

I'm a big fan of M.C. Escher's work, so I was pretty stoked to find this site. It's physical, 3-D models of his work, set up to mirror Escher's drawings exactly. Very cool stuff.

Escher For Real

Monday, September 27, 2004

Interesting...

http://allconsuming.net/at-this-time.cgi?year=2004&month=9&day=14&hour=19

Every few days I google my user names, just to see if anyone is talking shit about me on another forum. Heh. Apparently one of my articles made it's way to Allconsuming.net. It's under a review of Inside 9-11: What Really Happened.

I found that to be kind of curious, as I have never been to Allconsuming.net, and I have never submitted that article to anywhere but this blog. Does anyone have any info about this site, and how they get their reviews/information? And if anyone is visiting this site, did they get the link from Allconsuming.net?

Mushrooms and X legalized??

So it may become easier to get prescription Ecstacy and prescription 'shrooms than it is to get medical marijuana. Something seem off to you? I mean, I'm all for the legalization of these 2 substances (read up on how Ecstacy was used in couples therapy in the 1970's. Doctors said a 1 hour session with MDMA was the equivelant of a full year of therapy.), but damn....

http://www.wired.com/news/medtech/0,1286,65025,00.html?tw=wn_tophead_1

Psychedelic drugs are inching their way slowly but surely toward prescription status in the United States, thanks to a group of persistent scientists who believe drugs like ecstasy and psilocybin can help people with terminal cancer, obsessive-compulsive disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder, to name just a few.

The Heffter Research Institute, the Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies and others have managed to persuade the Food and Drug Administration to approve a handful of clinical trials using psychedelics. The movement seems to be gaining ground in recent years. Since 2001, the FDA and the Drug Enforcement Administration have given the go-ahead to three clinical trials testing psychedelics on symptomatic patients, and several more are on deck.

Doctors who saw their patients benefit from psychedelic drugs back when they were legal are dedicated to jumping through bureaucratic hoops and diminishing the drugs' party stigma to get psychedelics in patients' hands, and brains.

"I'm interested in the treatment being available to people who need it, and doing it aboveboard and publishing good results," said George Greer, founder of the Heffter Research Institute, a scientific organization that organizes and funds trials involving psychedelics.

At first blush, it seems like an uphill battle more challenging than the one medical-marijuana advocates have been facing. MDMA has been vilified by the National Institute on Drug Abuse and in news stories, making it seem unlikely that federal agencies will ever allow the legal use of psychedelics.

But it might actually be easier to get psychedelics through the approval process than marijuana, according to Rick Doblin, founder and president of MAPS. The roadblock with marijuana has centered on supply. A government-controlled crop in Mississippi is the only marijuana the government will allow in clinical trials. But the supply of psychedelics is decentralized, and the researchers have control of much of it.

Doblin's persistence and know-how -- he has a doctorate in public policy from Harvard's John F. Kennedy School of Government -- led to the launch of the first FDA-approved clinical trial testing MDMA as a therapy (in this case for post-traumatic stress disorder) since the drug became illegal.

And now it looks like Doblin's alma mater may be close to launching the first psychedelic research that Harvard has allowed on its campus in almost 40 years. Two weeks ago, Dr. John Halpern, an associate director of the substance-abuse research program at Harvard's McLean Hospital, presented his proposal for testing MDMA as a treatment for anxiety in terminal cancer patients to an institutional review board -- a body of scientists, ethicists and community members -- which approves and keeps tabs on studies.

"It feels like we're getting close to opening the door to psychedelic research at Harvard, which has been shut since 1965, so these are exciting times," Doblin said.

Halpern is also working with Bob Wold, a 51-year-old construction firm owner who suffered from debilitating cluster headaches, which are rare but brutal, until four years ago when he tried psilocybin to treat them. Wold had never used psychedelic drugs recreationally, and he was concerned and skeptical about using an illegal substance. But he was in the midst of choosing between three surgeries for his cluster headaches, each of which would have cost about $35,000. One involved a gamma knife to cut into his brain; the other two required holes drilled in his skull. Given those options, psilocybin didn't seem so radical.

"(The psilocybin) broke my cycle" of headaches, Wold said. "There is nothing on the market now, and there never has been, that will actually break a cycle."

Achieving relief from his nightmarish pain spurred Wold to start a movement. He now runs clusterbusters.com, where he communicates with about 200 other cluster-headache victims who have tried psilocybin to relieve their pain. Wold has collected reams of data in the form of questionnaires, which Halpern can present to Harvard's institutional review board.

Studies starting as early as the '30s that showed positive results treating cluster and migraine headaches with psilocybin and LSD helped Wold decide to try a psychedelic. The studies also showed success with other disorders including depression, alcoholism and addiction to other drugs like heroin.

The Heffter institute's Greer saw firsthand the effects of MDMA on his patients in the early '80s. He synthesized his own MDMA (it was first synthesized by Merck in 1912) along with Alexander Shulgin, who became a cult figure for psychedelic enthusiasts. In 1986, Greer and his wife, Requa Tolbert, a clinical nurse, published the first and what is still the largest body of data on the therapeutic effects of ecstasy.

Greer hoped eventually to discover the mechanism of MDMA, which stands for 3,4-methylenedioxy-N-methylamphetamine, and get it approved as a prescription drug for certain ailments. But starting in 1985, the tone of psychedelic research changed. Ecstasy had become a popular street drug, and the DEA declared MDMA a schedule 1 drug, the highest level of illegal drug in the United States. Anyone caught using or distributing ecstasy, including doctors, would face fines and jail time, and Greer stopped prescribing it for his patients.

"The government was funding a lot of research about abuse of psychedelic drugs," Greer said, "but no one was funding research to use them to understand how the brain works or to treat people with psychological or medical problems."

Another reason progress has been slow is because NIDA-funded studies performed by Dr. George Ricaurte and Dr. Una McCann found that MDMA had ill effects on the brain. A 2002 study was particularly worrisome because it showed that ecstasy caused Parkinson's-like brain damage. But a year later, the researchers retracted the study because they discovered they had accidentally used methamphetamine instead of ecstasy.

In the wake of these controversial results, psilocybin, the active ingredient in "magic mushrooms," seemed more acceptable to the FDA and DEA. Dr. Charles Grob, head of adolescent and child psychiatry at the Harbor-UCLA Medical Center, tried for almost a decade to get the go-ahead to perform a study using MDMA to treat anxiety in terminal cancer patients. He got permission in the early '90s to use the drug in a safety study on healthy volunteers, the results of which were published in Behavioral Brain Research in 1996, and the Journal of Magnetic Resonance Imaging in 1999.

But what he really wanted was to work with a patient population. When after several years neither the FDA nor the DEA went for the idea, he changed his proposal.

"By the late '90s felt it felt hopeless to work with MDMA because it had gotten such a negative reputation, so we revamped the study to work with psilocybin," Grob said. "In 2003, it was accepted."

Due to the strict guidelines for the study, however, only two patients out of the 12 necessary to complete the trial have participated in the study, and another is lined up.

Dr. Francisco Moreno at the University of Arizona has administered psilocybin to eight obsessive-compulsive disorder patients. His study, which began in 2001, was the first FDA-approved clinical trial involving a psychedelic in 30 years. He presented positive results at a recent scientific meeting, and is in the process of publishing his data in a medical journal.

"I'm very optimistic for the future," Grob said. "I think these compounds have tremendous untapped potential to be utilized within medicine and psychology. I think they need to be demystified, and safety parameters need to be established and studied. But with good controls, I think they can be used safely and effectively."




Tweaky

Well, I went and fucked something up in my code. I was messing around with it over the weekend, and I tweaked something. Now my page loads VERY slowly, and a few things are messed up. I have installed a backup I had (thank god I am fanatical about doing that), so for the next day or two, until I get around to redoing the site, art in certain areas might not appear, and things may look a bit off. Just bear with me, I'll have things back to normal here soon.

Thanks!!

Sunday, September 26, 2004

Golden Dumpies

As I have said before, when I finish posting I usually hit the Next Blog button in the upper right-hand corner. I figure if I take the time to visit and comment on other people's boards, then maybe I'll get more traffic. It seems to be working, too.

But there is a seedy underbelly to Next Blog. A world of she-male porn, bRoKeN cApSlOcKs KeYs, seizure-inducing color schemes and tarable grammur and speling. Christian teens run rampant, and for some reason, everyone in Brazil posts at 2:30pm MST.

So I have compiled a list of the contents in the Blogger Dumpster. The Golden Raspberry Award for blogs, if you will. I've made a few different categories that these sites fit into, and they all have to meet a certain criteria. I will be adding to this thread constantly, and everyone is welcome to submit. I will feature it on the sidebar so it is always accessable.

Here are the rules:

1) All blogs must be Blogger Affiliated. If you can't get there through the Next Blog feature, then you are ineligeble. Sorry Xanga and LiveJournal. Maybe next time.

2) Entries must fit into one of the following categories.

i) Color Gone Awry. This is for any board that makes you cringe and look away from the screen lest your eyeballs explode. It can be a font, a background, a color scheme or lots of flashing or scrolling adddons (chatterbox, animated links, etc.)

ii) Grammatical Nightmares. These are the blogs take forever to decipher. Not just occasional misspellings; no one is perfect, even I have a few posts where I forgot to run spellchecker. I'm talking about blogs that look like they were done in PGP. Txt msging psts whre thr R no vwls n ne of d wrds. Posts that like are written in like the way you talk to your fifteen year old friends or whatever and there are just like tons of run-on sentences and like junk like that all over the place like you are typing on speed whee!!! If you have to stop after every third word to consult a dictionary, then this is the category for them.


iii) Coding Calamity. Blogs that take FOREVER to load, require you to install special fonts or packs, have 5 prompts before the main page and popup ads flying at you every second or so. Scrollbars everywhere and none of them work. Things like that.

iv) Unexpected Porn. This includes straight, gay, transvestite, animal, text, video or any sort of genitals on your screen. Can be tasteful or trashy.

v) WTF, Mate?!. Anything that seems very strange to you. Terrorist Fun Runs, Teenage Mormon Midgets, Sites written in Klingon, Fanatical Redneck Muslims... if you scratch your head and go "huh??", this is where it goes.

vi) Teenage Wasteland. This is for teenage angst. Sites devoted to Joy Division and Witchcraft. Bleak poetry, goth-leanings and suicide references are a must.

vii) Word of God. Sites that do nothing but quote from the Bible, the Koran, The Turner Diaries or whatever the hell Scientologists read from. Also for Zealots and Falwell/7oo Club type blogs. Jesus save us from these people!

viii) That's Just Sad. For all the stalker sites, the I NEED ATTENTION!!! blogs and wierdos who have a conversations with stuffed animals.

ix) Worst in Show. This is the big prize. This goes to the worst of the worst of the worst. The blog that made you vomit in rage and horror when you saw it. It made you sterile and gave you retinal cancer. This is SHITE!


3) Entries can not go into multiple categories. If you have a site you would like to submit, attach the link with the category you would like to enter it into. Multiple entries are welcome.

4) You can vote on multiple blogs, but only 1 vote per category. I will keep track of the votes and post them next to each entry. This contest will go on for an undetermined amount of time. I will be keeping this thread in a new section in the sidebar I created called "Favorites". So feel free to check in from time to time to view and submit anytime you come across something HORRIBLE.


Golden Dumpster Entries

Color Gone Awry
http://audrey2bryan.blogspot.com/
http://everything-.blogspot.com/
http://rictresa.blogspot.com/

Grammatical Nightmare
http://doggielurver.blogspot.com/
http://h4ida.blogspot.com/
http://sligolife.blogspot.com/

Coding Calamity
http://3bluestars.blogspot.com/
http://adinonline.blogspot.com/

Unexpected Porn
http://tanguinhadeliciosa.blogspot.com/
http://sex-toy-lovers-chat.blogspot.com/

WTF, Mate?!
http://terrorism-protection.blogspot.com/
http://dameion.blogspot.com/

Teenage Wasteland
http://snowparadise.blogspot.com/

Word of God
http://lifeteenadam.blogspot.com/
http://akpbible.blogspot.com/
http://thewearypilgrim.blogspot.com/

That's Just Sad
http://shellyfire.blogspot.com/
http://dameion.blogspot.com/

Worst in Show
http://catholicsforbush.blogspot.com/
http://pinkie-princessdiary.blogspot.com/
http://porcelain_suicide.blogspot.com/

Argh!

You ever worked on a project for 3 hours, only to have Windows swallow it whole? *sigh*. I really don't want to repost that whole damn article.....

Declare Yourself

If you haven't registered to vote yet, now's your chance.

http://www.declareyourself.com/index.html

Coming soon...

I am going to be adding a sister site shortly that will focus strictly on my photography. I've noticed that will multiple picture posts, things really lag and... ok, I'm lying. This is just an excuse to fiddle with different templates and designs.

Anyhow, be on the lookout for that.

Saturday, September 25, 2004


Purple Sun. Posted by Hello

Ahhh! My eyes!! The goggles do nothing!!

THIS IS YOUR WARNING! ABANDON ALL HOPE, YE WHO FOLLOW THESE LINKS!! NSFW!!

The horror!!

Seriously, of the 500+ pages I have scanned through on blogger, this is probably the worst.

That ought to teach me to hit "Next Blog" when I finish posting. If you are a sadist in need of some more eye-gouging terror, scroll down the page. This one here is the one that made me scrub my eyes with steel wool. I really had problems going to each individual page to get the links. That's how much I value my readers though. I will subject myself to unspeakable acts of... well, I won't ruin it for those of you who didn't look.


Now, I must go shower. For a long, long time.

Thursday, September 23, 2004

Jackass

Ok, I hilighted the best comments in red. Who the hell calls marijuana "appetite stimulating hippie weed"?!? The dig on Parliment smokers was good though. Everyone at my job smokes Parliment Lights, so I made sure to forward it on.


Police Beat
by Ryan Hawk/ryan@coastalview.com


When three is definitely a crowd

Two deputies on foot patrol at the intersection of Santa Monica and Via Real noticed the loud 1993 Ford Explorer pull up to, and roll through the stop sign. The white truck sped quickly across the intersection, swung into the parking lot of the convenience store and parked with an abrupt jerk right next to the officers.

The deputies were not amused with the premature engine, tire and brake wear the three 18-year-olds inside were causing the innocent SUV. They called the driver and front passenger out to question them.

Soon, the third passenger, a Santa Barbara youth who had been seated in the back seat, was up for questioning. But he wasn’t interested in having his rights violated, he said. He pressed down the automatic locks, but the driver’s window was left open, so the officer pulled up the lock.

The youth in the back seat pressed it down again. The smell of alcohol and appetite stimulating hippie weed was too strong to keep the officer from losing this fight, however. When stated to the youth that he was causing a delay in the investigation with this charade, the 18-year-old moved his hand around, fidgeting with something inside his pocket.

The officer opened the door and the youth stepped out, yelling he was being searched illegally. The pat down revealed a cigarette box in the front pocket. Knowing that no self-respecting man smokes Parliament Lights, the officer opened the box to reveal it was stuffed with marijuana. The 18-year-old began flailing his arms and pushed the two officers back. But the handcuffs were soon in place and he was on his way to jail.

A wooden pipe and a glass marijuana pipe with burnt residue were subsequently located inside the vehicle. The driver was warned not to drive so carelessly in the future.

Rehab Petition

Just a bit of support rolling in from Rational Everyday Humans Against BethRobbins

Ericka McClelland:
It's the job of the parent to be responsable for their child. If your child is looking at things on the internet that you don't approve of it's your fault not the fault of the person who posted it.

Michael Mathews:
I agree - let's invent the helmet instead of banning the bike

nadalala:
wicked... -thumbsup-

Dan:
I have to say I feel sorry for Beth Robbins. I do think what she attempted was a moronic, hypocritical, naive play at righteous censorship, and I am a staunch fan of Maddox myself, but I do hope she hasn't taken things too hard. Her site and email have wound down under what must be a horrific amount of Maddox support, and I can't begin to imagine what a shock to her system that might be. But hopefully one of the few things she actually understands is that by posting something like her petition online, for the whole world to see, she opens herself to the exact same form of attack she uses herself. I wonder what her kids make of all this? Anyway, long live Maddox, and may Beth Robbins' children understand the nature of satire in a way she never will!

Rory:
Im 100 percent behind this


C'mon! Support this cause! I know it sounds kinds lame, but if you let people like this continue to attempt to suppress free speech, it will be gone before you know what happened.

Go here: http://www.petitiononline.com/REHAB

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

Bumper Politics

Heh.




Pretty good:




Very true:







And my personal favorite:






Thanks to Observational Pissings for the pics.

Shoot to Vote

Love In War

Are you a democrat or a republican? Kill people and find out! It turns out I'm just a lousy democrat. I shouldn't have killed "KKK Guy" and let "No Good Immigrant" live. Does this mean that I am now legally obligated to vote for Kerry?

Tuesday, September 21, 2004

First Ladies

Is it just me, or does Dick Cheney look better as a woman? Kerry is just gruesome.







It's the music...

I've decided to start adding music and book reviews to my site. Not very often, and not for mediocre products, but for anything that really stands out, be it in a good way or a bad way. I'm going to do this because there are very, very few people out there that have good taste in music. It's unfortunate that the majority of people only listen to what the radio tells them to. This is made painfully obvious each time I stumble across a music review blog.

Now, the opinions I express about music are just that; opinions. I am not claiming to be the utmost authority when it comes to music.... No, that's a lie. I'm the fucking music guru. And if you don't agree with me, you're wrong. Heh. So what I am going to do is try and educate a few of you about REAL music, and maybe get people to buy the album of an artist with talent, instead of just giving Blink 182 or Staind another fat, undeserved paycheck.

I'm mainly going to focus on hip-hop at first, because that's the music style that I feel is the most exploited, and under-appreciated genre. Hip-hop has received a bad rap (no pun intended) since it's inception, and I find it sad that when most people think of hip-hop, they immediately think of Dr. Dre, Chingy or Nelly. So if you like those particular "artists", prepare to be ridiculed.

I'm going to make this a 5 post series. Mainly because I have a few different topics I would like to discuss, but also because of the length of each article, and the amount of links contained in each one. If I made a single post, I don't think people would read the entire thing. So, I am going to break it into the following topics (which will be posted in no particular order):

1) The Classics. Old-school hip-hop, and the pioneers who brought it to you.
2) Rap vs. Hip-hop.
3) Rap Isn't a Color. (10 white rappers that are better than Eminem)
4) Must have albums for all 'heads.
5) Types and Genres (From freestyle to turntablism, beat matching to abstract and everything between).

Be on the lookout for these articles, I'm going to try and put one up each day. Also, I am giving away prizes for this series. Each title is going to be a line from a song (this post included). If you are the first person to CORRECTLY identify the line, and can tell me who the artist is, or the song it is from, I will give to you one of the following:

A Gmail invite
A link to your site on my board
Starbucks coffee, shipped to your door.

Note: I am not just taking these samples from hip-hop, so don't limit your searches to only that genre.

The contest starts NOW.

Sex for votes.

Votergasm



Do it! Vote, that is. You'll take it in the ass this November one way or another, so you might as well have fun doing it!

Monday, September 20, 2004

Addiction Potential

Addiction Potential for each drug. Statistically, you have more of a chance of becoming addicted to Valium, Alcohol, Nicotine or Caffeine (legal) than Marijuana (illegal).

I also find it interesting that Alcohol, Amphetamines and Heroin have the same addiction percentage, and you are GUARANTEED to become addicted to cigarettes. Go figure.

100%    Nicotine
98.5%    Meth (smoked)
97.6%    Crack
94.0%    Meth (snorted)
85.6%    Valium
83.4%    Quaalude
82.1%    Seconal
81.1%    Alcohol
81.1%    Heroin
81.1%    Crank
73.1%    Cocaine
72.0%    Caffeine
55.7%    PCP
21.1%    Marijuana
20.1%    Ecstasy (MDMA)
17.1%    Psilocybin (Mushrooms)
16.7%    LSD
16.7%    Mescaline

*Source: The Order of Things: How Everything in the World Is Organized into Hierarchies, Structures, and Pecking Orders by Barbara Ann Kipfer.

Sue Niederer is my hero.

"Every nation in every region now has a decision to make. Either you are with us or you are with the terrorists."
-President GWB


Taken from Counterpunch.org
Sue Niederer's son was killed in Iraq in February, 2004. Below are snippets of her interview with Counterpunch:

What is your response to the recent evidence that this war was waged on the basis of "misinformation"?

"I wanted to rip the president's head off. Curse him, yell at him, call him a self righteous bastard and a lot of other words. I think if I had him in front of me I would shoot him in the groined area. Let him suffer. And just continue shooting him there. Put him through misery, like he's doing to everyone else. He doesn't deserve any better."

Are you worried that Bush could win in November?

"Extremely concerned. If this country allows him, we are the fools. We deserve everything we get or do not get from him. We are allowing him to get away with anything he wants to do. He flat out lied to us, killing our troops. He doesn't face the fallen family. If this is what we reelect, we deserve everything we get."


Sue, you fucking rock. Thank you for publicly saying those things. I believe that you have bigger balls than all the reporters at CBS, ABC, NBC and FOX combined. You're right, too. If Bush does get re-elected, we're screwed, and we'll have no one to blame but ourselves. Right now, the rest of the world views us as a nation whose citizens and politicians don't agree. If GWB wins, we will lost that tenuous grasp on peace that we now have, and we will slowly descend into chaos.

To make an analogy:
If you order dinner at a restaurant, and receive rotten mean, overcooked potatoes and sour milk, it's not your fault. You were deceived. But if you eat that rotten food, and then go back for seconds, then you deserve the food poisoning your dumbass gets. It's called "Learning From Your Mistakes".

Don't go back for seconds. If you do, then be prepared to enter a world of shit. Other countries are forgiving, but only to a point. So, this November, kick GWB right in the "groined" area by voting for someone else. Kick him HARD. You don't have to vote for Kerry; I won't be. Don't make Bush Deuce the next Nixon.

Of course, if you were dumb enough to vote for Nixon the second time around, then chances are you'll be voting Republican this election.


Friday, September 17, 2004

Afro Ninja

Fear the drunken wrath of.... AFRO NINJA!!

Link

What a cocktail

The toxicology reports just came back. Let's see what Rick James had in his system at the time of death:

"Toxicology revealed the presence of the following drugs: Alprazolam (Xanax), Diazepam (Valium), Bupropion (Wellbutrin), Citalopram (Celexa), Hydrocodone (Vicodin), Digoxin, Chlorpheniramine, methamphetamine, and cocaine," the statement said. "None of the drugs or drug combinations were found to be at levels that were life threatening in and of themselves."

Wow. What a list:

Xanax: Minor tranquilizer for anxiety
Valium: Minor tranquilizer for anxiety
Wellbutrin: Anti-depressant
Celexa: Anti-depressant
Vicodin: Pain killer
Digoxin: For fast heart rates (cause by the cocaine, no doubt)
Chlorpheniramine: Antihistamine (essentially, speed)
Methamphetamine: Upper
Cocaine: Upper

So a more apt line would be "Xanax, Valium, Wellbutrin, Celexa, Vicodin, Digoxin, Chlorpheniramine, Methamphetamine and Cocaine is a helluva drug. I'm Rick James, bitch!"



Thursday, September 16, 2004

Up in smoke

Time to clear the air about something. I smoke pot.

That sentence right there usually makes all the close-minded people either run off in horror, or go straight to Google to find a list of all the bad things marijuana does to you. So, for those of you still reading, let me continue...

I am an epileptic. I was diagnosed when I was 13 years old. The type of epilepsy I have is idiopathic, and if you want to know a little bit more about it, check out WebMD.

Anyway, since I was diagnosed, I have gone through many, many different types of treatments, from mixing and matching up to 4 medications at a time, to a specialized diet and lots of things in between (for the record, I have tried over 9 different meds in the past 12 years). I have considered brain surgery, but for the type of epilepsy I have, the risk of having the surgery is greater than the proposed benefit.

Because of the types of medication I take, I have side effects ranging from mild things such as constipation, blurred vision, dizziness, suppressed appetite and headache, to more moderate side effects like loss of coordination, jittery eyes (that one is fun, ever had triple or quadruple vision before?), night terrors and jaw clenching, to SEVERE side effects such as HALLUCINATIONS, blisters in my mouth, deadly skin rash ("Like a sunburn that will kill you" is how my neurologist described it), and severe stomach pains. Now keep in mind that these symptoms are just side effects from the drugs I am taking to combat the epilepsy. Perfectly legal, doctor-prescribed, government-approved drugs. FDA Approved. Kaiser gives them out like candy.

The seizures themselves aren't nearly as bad as some people have it, I just have petit-mal episodes that last from 15 seconds to a minute at a time, and I don't convulse, but I might clench my fists, I just kind of space out; my vision gets wavy, and my balance is thrown off. My pupils get huge, and I'm usually unable to speak until it is over. The dead-fish look is what my friends call it. The seizures vary in frequency, for about 2 years I was having 2 an hour, but with the new experimental meds I am on, I am down to maybe 5, mostly right before I fall asleep. Sometimes I can go a full day without having one, and if anyone reading this actually HAS epilepsy, then they can attest to how much a relief even 1 DAY without a seizure can be.

I have done my share of experimenting with drugs in my time; I'm not going to make a list of everything I have done, but I believe that if you don't try something and have no experience with it, then you have no right to bitch about the harm it causes or the damage it does. This goes not only for drugs, but life in general. If all of your experience is second-hand, you only have an outsiders P.O.V. to go by, and I think that someone that bitches about the evils of marijuana, yet has never smoked it, is a hypocrite. Take that how you will. But if I have never flown in a plane before, I wouldn't start spouting off on how horrible airline food is.

Now, let me say something that will cause outrage amongst many people. I HATE alcohol. I dislike the feeling I get from it, I don't like the side effects that come from drinking it, I don't particularly enjoy the drunk sensation and I don't like how people act while drinking it. That may just be because of my condition, or because of my meds, but whatever the reason, I have made the choice to stay away from alcohol. But I don't rag on people when they are drinking, it's their choice, and if that's what you want to spend your money on, then have at it. It's your choice, and it's none of my business.

The real reason I am posting this is because according to Colorado law (the state I currently reside in), I am eligible for medicinal marijuana. With a doctor's note, I can legally possess up to 2 ounces or 6 plants at a time. Of course, it's still a federal crime to have it; I can get it prescribed by my doctor, but I can't fill that prescription, and even with the card that says I am legally allowed to use marijuana, I can get arrested for having it. God Bless the hypocricy of the United States Government.

Whether it is legal or not, I still smoke it, because it HELPS. It calms me down, and not only will it eliminate some of the side effects of my medication, but it will prevent me from having seizures. It helps with my insomnia, another side effect of my meds (drowsiness and insomnia, how does that work?). Some of you may say that this is just a placebo effect, that it only works because I believe it works, but whatever the reason, it helps me. I sleep better, I have more of an appetite, and I DON'T HAVE SEIZURES!!! <-- key point!! I am not a drug abuser, but I DO spend a fair amount of time high. I have a good job that I have held for almost 4 years now, on top of that I have my own business that I operate on the side, I write a lot of essays and short stories, I play bass, guitar and program music on my computer, I read an average of 3 books a week, I aced the English, Grammar and Writing parts of my college entrance exam (now waiting for someone to point out a spelling or grammar error in my post.......), my IQ was rated as 139 and I take pride in learning something new as often as possible. Instead of smoking a joint and watching TV for 8 hours like your average pothead, I smoke a joint and go hiking, or teach myself HTML, or read, or play music. Now this is not an attempt to prove how great a person I am, or that I'm some sort of pot-smoking genius; I'm simply stating that I use marijuana for legitimate medical reasons, and seeing as how I smoke about an ounce every week or two, and have been doing so for the past 8 years, I think I am doing pretty good for myself. It doesn't take me 30 seconds to respond to a question, and I can carry out complex tasks while high. So talk out your ass all you want about drugs doing nothing but harming people and society, and how only the scum of the earth smoke the dank, but unless you can honestly tell me that you smoke marijuana for (once again) LEGITIMATE MEDICAL REASONS, then I am inclined to think that you are just another uninformed idiot that thinks that they know what is best for everyone. To wrap this up, let me say that Pot helps me. Whether you want to believe that or not, it helps me. And for someone to so quickly discredit the proven advantages and medical uses of marijuana without knowing anything other than what they have read in a few articles or some government-funded case studies, well, that speaks volumes about who they are as a person. I hate to compare it to abortion, but if you aren't a woman, it ain't your call. Same with this. Unless you have glacoma, epilepsy, AIDS or lukemia, and have conducted an "independant study" on how marijuana either helps or hinders you, S.T.F.U. I have added a section to my sidebar titled "Legalize". Now, I am all for complete legalization of Marijuana as well as other drugs. I think that what you do with your body and your life is no one elses' business. I also believe that some of the most dangerous drugs out there are perfectly legal. Oxycontin, alcohol, Morphine, tobacco and caffeine top the list. Considering that you have less than a 25% chance of becoming addicted to marijuana, and a 99% chance of becoming addicted to cigarettes (crack cocaine is right below it, with a 96% chance of addiction), I'm not too worried. Out of the links I added, I would urge you to support either the Marijuana Policy Project
or Law Enforcement Against Prohibition. I added NORML to the list, even though they strike me as an orginization of potheads using medical marijuana as an excuse to legalize it for personal use. The other 2 links are facts about the American Drug War, and distortions that are commonly spread about drugs and the Drug War. They are both great sources of information.


You can either admire me, despise me or just not give a damn. But marijuana has been a part of my life for quite some time now, and I intend to keep it that way. Judge me if you will, but it won't make a bit of difference. My life is my life, and my health is my health. Don't make my decisions for me; feel free to disagree or challenge my points, but keep the holier-than-thou attitude to yourself. I've made my choice.

What's yours?

Duhhhhbya

Sovereignty: Noun.


1) Supremacy of authority or rule as exercised by a sovereign or sovereign state.
2) Royal rank, authority, or power.
3) Complete independence and self-government.
4) A territory existing as an independent state.

I think it's quite obvious that GWB has NO idea what sovereignty means.

http://media.ebaumsworld.com/sovereignty.mov


Wednesday, September 15, 2004

I'm not that old, am I?

Every year Beloit College in Beloit, Wisconsin publishes what it calls "The Mindset List" -- fun facts and figures about the incoming crop of freshmen so professors will be able to relate to their new students.

Beloit says the list is a reminder that the world view of today's new college students is significantly different from the intellectual framework of those students who entered only a few years earlier. Put another way, it's a reminder that you are getting on in years.

Today's college freshmen were born in 1986, the same year that Chernobyl melted down and the Challenger exploded. Clint Eastwood was elected mayor of Carmel, Calif., and the Soviets were bogged down for the seventh year of frustration in Afghanistan. Domestically, we were preoccupied by the Iran Contra scandal and internationally, the Iran-Iraq war continued to reveal a disturbing list of atrocities.

So to better understand how the class of 2008 thinks, read this and feel your age:

1. Most students entering college this fall were born in 1986.
2. Desi Arnaz, Orson Welles, Roy Orbison, Ted Bundy, Ayatollah Khomeini, and Cary Grant have always been dead.
3. "Heeeere's Johnny!" is a scary greeting from Jack Nicholson, not a warm welcome from Ed McMahon.
4. The Energizer bunny has always been going and going and going.
5. Large fine-print ads for prescription drugs have always appeared in magazines.
6. Photographs have always been processed in an hour or less.
7. They never got a chance to drink 7-Up Gold, Crystal Pepsi, or Apple Slice.
8. Baby Jessica could be a classmate.
9. Parents may have been reading "The Bourne Supremacy" or "It" as they rocked them in their cradles.
10. Alan Greenspan has always been setting the nation's financial direction.
11. The U.S. has always been a Prozac nation.
12. They have always enjoyed the comfort of pleather.
13. Harry has always known Sally.
14. They never saw Roseanne Roseannadanna live on "Saturday Night Live."
15. There has always been a Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.
16. They never ate a McSub at McD's.
17. There has always been a Comedy Channel.
18. Bill and Ted have always been on an excellent adventure.
19. They were never tempted by smokeless cigarettes.
20. Robert Downey, Jr. has always been in trouble.
21. Martha Stewart has always been cooking up something with someone.
22. They have always been comfortable with gay characters on television.
23. Mike Tyson has always been a contender.
24. The government has always been proposing we go to Mars, and it has always been deemed too expensive.
25. There have never been any Playboy Clubs.
26. There have always been night games at Wrigley Field.
27. Rogaine has always been available for the follicularly challenged.
28. They never saw USA Today or the Christian Science Monitor as a TV news program.
29. Computers have always suffered from viruses.
30. We have always been mapping the human genome.
31. Politicians have always used rock music for theme songs.
32. Network television has always struggled to keep up with cable.
33. O'Hare has always been the most delay-plagued airport in the U.S.
34. Ivan Boesky has never sold stock.
35. Toll-free 800 phone numbers have always spelled out catchy phrases.
36. Bethlehem has never been a place of peace at Christmas.
37. Episcopal women bishops have always threatened the foundation of the Anglican Church.
38. Svelte Oprah has always dominated afternoon television; who was Phil Donahue anyway?
39. They never flew on People Express.
40. AZT has always been used to treat AIDS.
41. The international community has always been installing or removing the leader of Haiti.
42. Oliver North has always been a talk show host and news commentator.
43. They have suffered through airport security systems since they were in strollers.
44. They have done most of their search for the right college online.
45. Aspirin has always been used to reduce the risk of a heart attack.
46. They were spared the TV ads for Zamfir and his panpipes.
47. Castro has always been an aging politician in a suit.
48. There have always been non-stop flights around the world without refueling.
49. Cher hasn't aged a day.
50. M.A.S.H. was a game: Mansion, Apartment, Shelter, House.

Never had Crystal Pepsi?? How about OK Soda? Does anyone else remember that? And computer viruses. Hell, I remember surfing the internet before there was advertising. Now THAT was great. No pop-ups, no annoying scrolling ads in the middle of story, no emails asking if I want to "1ncr34s3 the s1ze of my p3n.1s with v1agr4." Ah, well. Pointless nostalgia.

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

Fuck John Elway

Right now I am sitting at work, listening to John Elway introduce the President at Coors Field. I take issue with this for a number of reasons. First of all, sports and politics should NEVER, EVER, EVEREVEREVER be intertwined. The two go together like peanut butter and mustard.

Second, I don't think that Gov. Owens should be introducing John Elway. If anything, it should be the other way around. How is it that an EX-sports figure (and not just a recent ex-sports figure) is held in higher regard than our own Governor? That's living in Conservative Colorado for you. Last year we were listed as the "City with the most fanatical sports fans". That's a pretty shitty award to get. Apt, but still not something I would want to hang on my wall. In Colorado, sports consist of the following:

AVALANCHE WIN!! LET'S RIOT!!
BRONCOS WIN!!! LET'S RIOT!!!!
ROCKIES NEVER WIN!!! LET'S RIOT!!
CU PLAYS CSU!! LET'S RIOT!!
NUGGETS....Wait, who are the Nuggets again? Oh yeah, Carmello Anthony's team. LET'S RIOT!!!!


Conservative Colorado is so starved for any sort of local celebrity figure, that we put more stock into what John Elway says than we do our president. We listen to what he says because we are a state of morons and drunken tailgaters. I love this state, but God help me, I HATE the people who live here. If it's not Elway, it's Patrick Roy (WAAHH!!) or Ray Bourque (also retired) who are influencing the collective consciousness. Is that what you really want? A group of people who have made a career out of getting hit in the head? That doesn't seem too bright to me. Everyone here complains that celebrities shouldn't be able to use their "Star Power" to influence people to vote for a certain candidate, yet we blindly follow the path of Elway.

I'm going to be frank and very honest. John Elway isn't shit. He won Denver a few Superbowl titles, but he FAILED (miserably) in the first 2/3 of his career. Does anyone else remember the trouncing we received from the Washington Redskins?

The man sells USED CARS, OK? You're not taking advice from some sort of powerful sports guru, you are taking advice from someone that wants to put you into a new Toyota Camry. And someone who refuses to haggle over the price.

Elway, you're just a cheap pimp. And Colorado is the whore sucking your orange and blue cock. Shame on you AND this state.

Anyhow, I thought I would catch a few of the highlights of the 40 minute speech that Dubya made today. Here's the cream of the crop. My comments are added in parenthesis.

"Please help me welcome the ultimate Quarterback, George W. Bush!" -John Elway
(With all your millions of dollars, couldn't you pay someone to write that speech FOR you?)

"I'm proud to be back here in beautiful Colaraduh, where the cowboy hats outnumber the ties." -W
(First of all, it's ColoradO, not Coloraduh, although I can see how you might make that mistake. There's more Duh than Dough here. And second, you obviously have not been to ColoradO in a long time, because the only cowboy hats that I see are on the tourists and ranchers living way out in the boonies. ColoradO isn't a cow town anymore, we are not all podunk halfwits, although I think this particular speech rounded most of them up. We may not be New York or Chicago, but just because we're surrounded by Wyoming, Nebraska, Kansas and Utah doesn't make us morons. We apparently just assemble to LISTEN to the morons.)

"When you're out rounding up the vote....." -W
(Oh, stop it with the pathetic attempt to sound like a cowboy. We don't "round up votes". Stop using these hackneyed and cliche terms to try and become more like us. To the people that aren't blinded by the right, you're further alienating yourself. You sound like a backwoods hick. And I don't want another hillbilly president.)

"4 more years....4 more years" -Crowd
(To Republicans and Democrats alike: Let's get a better chant, eh? You actually cut GW off in the middle of a sentence to do this. I would love to hear "SOY-LENT GREEN! SOY-LENT GREEN!" at the next speech.)

"We must become less dependant on foreign sources of energy" -W
(Then why are we trying so damn hard to take over oil rich countries?)

"The rich hire lawyers and accountants for a reason. To stick you with the bill" -W
(Hi there, Pot! My name is Kettle!)

"Lybia is pursuing newQler weapons" -W
(4 years, and you still can't say New-Clear? I weep for the future.)

"I believe that when a President speaks, he should mean what he says" -W about Iraq and attacking Saddam
(Hi again, Pot! I'm Kettle, and I'm REALLY black!)

"Freedom isn't America's gift to the world. Freedom is the Almighty God's gift to the world"
(No, oppression, murder, hatred and ignorance are God's gift to the world. We came up with the freedom part ourselves.)

Bottom line: Colorado is a State of Idiocy. We elected a Brewmaster as the mayor of Denver, and we elected Pete Coors to the senate. We have more people here who smoke pot than any other state, including Kentucky, where most of the stuff comes from. We're just too fucked up to know what we're voting for.

Monday, September 13, 2004

Another idiot with an agenda.

I came across this petition today:
http://www.petitiononline.com/nomaddox/petition.html

Basically it was thrown together by a close-minded ignoramus who is unhappy with the content of the following website:
http://maddox.xmission.com

I have been visiting "The Best Page in the Universe" for some time now, and I find Maddox to be rather amusing. Sometimes childish, but still fun to read. And being the "Crusader for Free Speech" that I am, I decided to write her a little email:



Dear Beth Robbins,

I came across a link to your site on www.fazed.net (and maddox.xmission.com), and I must say that I haven't had a laugh like that since the petition to stop teenage masturbation made its way around the Internet.

Let me bring a little something to your attention. There's this nifty little bill out there, perhaps you have heard of it? If not, let me fill you in on the very first part:

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances."

So, you found something you don't agree with, eh? Welcome to Life 101. One of the wonderful things about this country is that we all have not just the ability, but the RIGHT to speak our minds, as the paragraph above clearly states. Maddox does just that. He speaks his mind, inserting things like humor and satire (are you familiar with either of these?) into his posts, and unfortunately, close-minded people like yourself tend to miss the point.

The same bill that allows Maddox to write whatever he wants also gives YOU the freedom to write whatever you want about Maddox. Kind of a catch-22, eh? The same bill that gives him the freedom to speak his mind gives you the freedom to speak out against him. If you succeed in shutting down "The Best Page in the Universe", who's to say that YOU won't be the next target? Did you ever stop and think that there may be a petition out there to shut down Mothers Against Maddox? Pick up a dictionary, look up "Irony", and let me know what it says.



I thought I would quote directly from your main page.

"I no longer allow my children to connect to the Internet without my supervision, because I do not want them to view such trash on the web, that promotes hate, suicide, violence, and bad-attitude."

Well, better turn off the radio! I'd hate for your child to stumble across Rush Limbaugh by mistake. He might pick up some hateful values from there.

Keep a close eye on that library card. Your son might go and check out a book like "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer". He might pick up horrible words, like "nigger"! No wait, he can pick that up from television, magazines, radio and, well, just by walking down the street, listening to people talk.

Cancel your cable! The Soprano's said "Fuck" on HBO!! HERESY!!!

Throw away all your newspapers. Your son might read something unpleasant about the torture happening at Abu Ghraib, or the war in Iraq.

No more Presidential Addresses for you! You might be subjected to outright lies!

Damn, it sucks that the WTC was attacked; you were FORCED to watch that unpleasantness that ended up promoting "hate, suicide, violence and bad-attitude" And that's just within our government alone!

Here's an idea. Ship all the minorities to a different continent, then we won't have to hear racial epithets being used on a daily basis. That's a reasonable solution to the problem, right?


You are an extremely narrow-minded and naive woman. Society has been dealing with idiots like yourself for decades. You're not the first imbecile to attempt to impose your will on the rest of us. People have been doing it for YEARS. And without much success, might I add *coughcoughPROHIBITIONcoughcough*.

It's the bible-thumping do-gooders like you that make day-to-day living a hassle. If you don't like Maddox, DON'T GO TO HIS SITE! If you don't want your child being "corrupted" by the unspeakable evil that is Maddox, then block his access to the site. Or better yet, how about you take the time to fill your child's head with meaningful values, instead of recycled hatred?

Instead of lowering yourself to the level of Maddox, may I suggest that you take the noble approach and IGNORE him? It's kind of like television. If you don't like what is on, change the channel. Don't picket the station. If you don't like a particular book, put it down and don't read it. What you are doing is taking the book outside with the rest of your Nazi cohorts, and burning them, in hopes that no one will ever be befouled with the horrid stench of personal opinion.

By taking the time to create this petition and run this site, you are showing that you have nothing better to do with your time than complain about how someone else is living their life.

**NEWS FLASH**

Not everyone thinks the way you do! Get used to it! You find Maddox offensive? Well, I personally find you and your twisted, pseudo-Christian mentality to be a bigger plague on the Internet than Maddox ever could be.

I would like to suggest a book to you. It's called "1984", and it is by a very talented writer named George Orwell. You should check it out sometime, you might learn a thing or two from it (nah, who am I kidding, it will go straight over your head like most of this email will). If you don't have the time to read that book, let me suggest "Fahrenheit 451" by Ray Bradbury (Not to be confused with Fahrenheit 9/11 by Michael Moore).

Take some time to read those two books; better yet, why don't you sit down with your son and read them together, and then discuss the stories with him? Then you'll not only be expanding your mind, but showing your children that you care about them enough to spend time with them, and best of all, you'll show your son that you're not the lunatic parent/typical smothering mother who has too much time on her hands, and not enough common sense in her head.

There are many sites out there that are way more offensive and disgusting than "The Best Page in the Universe". I won't list them here, because all you'll do is start another on line petition, but at least take a look at http://ogrish.com. The things they show there are REAL FUCKING LIFE, and although you might be able to persuade someone to change their mind about something, you can't change the fact that horrible shit happens every day, no matter how much you would like to believe it doesn't.

This isn't 1942 anymore. Why don't you come back to reality, and leave the whining and complaining to the mindless drones who are seasoned at it, like Billy Graham or Pat Robertson.

Oh, and if you have a chance, please visit my site.
http://ekupes.blogspot.com

I'm sure you'll find something very offensive in there, like my complaints about 9/11, and now, YOU.

Thanks for your time, and have a TOLERANT day.

-tcl





Of course, her server was overloaded, and the email was bounced back to me. So I took it one step further. I created an online petition against Beth Robbins. It can be found below:

http://www.petitiononline.com/REHAB/petition.html

In case you don't want to go to the link, here is what the petition consists of:

This is a petition created by The Cunning Linguist, founder of Rational Everyday Humans Against BethRobbins (REHAB). The self-proclaimed "Mother Against Maddox" (http://MothersAgainstMaddox.cjb.net)is run by a disturbed, close-minded, pathetic religious zealot, otherwise known as Beth Robbins. Her website is giving children and weak-minded adults the wrong ideas about life, and the world we live in. The more support REHAB gains from intelligent, open-minded supporters of Free Speech, the better chance we have to shut her sick, distorted and dangerously naive site down.

Beth is an extremely half-baked jejune "human being" and her ego and sense of self-rightousness grows as the number of half-wits that get lured into her site increase. By using her twisted and immature "thoughts", she tricks people into believing her hateful, biased, hypocritical and simple-minded opinions about people, the Orwellian world she would like to live in, and life as she sees it.

I discovered her website when I found myself googling "Idiot". I was shocked to find out that my she has been promoting this site on a constant basis, for nearly a year. Ever since I started going to her website, I noticed an increase in my hatred towards certain groups of people and her puerile attitude towards life. I no longer visit her site, because I do not want to view such trash on the web; trash that promotes hate, childish behavior, suppression of the Bill of Rights, and fanatical anti-free speech attitude.

To see more examples of harmful content on Beth's website, visit http://MothersAgainstMaddox.cjb.net.

Stop Beth from brainwashing any more of our children and promoting abolishment of the First Amendment on the internet! Every signature this petition receives makes a difference in the fight against Beth. Help Rational Everyday Humans Against BethRobbins win this fight. Sign our petition, or send a supporting email to REHABPetition@gmail.com!


Sincerely,

The Undersigned



So, do me a favor, and sign this petition. Stop ignorant human beings like Beth Robbins from destroying what may very well be the final medium of Free Speech out there.

Thanks for your time, and if you have any questions about this petition, please email me at:
REHABPetition@gmail.com.

Saturday, September 11, 2004

Oh boy...

I'll start this out by openly saying that I am a prick, and you'll probably hate me for this post.

"September 11th. A day when a nation, shattered with grief asked, "Why?" -Discovery Times Channel.

Because people fucking hate us, that's why! What an asinine statement to make! It's 3 years later. I think it's time to ask another question. How about instead of just "Why", you ask "Why do people hate us?" I'll tell you why. It's because the big bully, the superpower of the world got a little too cocky, and finally pushed around the wrong group of people. Parallel that comment to what I write about Columbine a little later on.

We openly made comments about how when we attack a country, civilian casualties are "Collateral Damage", and although they are regrettable, it's ultimately justified. But when the shoe is on the other foot, all of a sudden those civilian casualties are abhorrent and disgraceful. Other countries look up to us like a little brother idolizes his big brother. And just like a big brother tends to do, we brush the smaller, weaker one aside, giving them the cold shoulder and causing them to build up resentment towards us.

Arabic culture goes back thousands and thousands of years. America is a couple hundred years old, and we killed off almost every bit of native culture that this country had. But we act like we are greater than anyone out there. We'll say it as often as we can. "We're the greatest nation on the planet!" We say it so often that we really don't pay attention to anything that happens outside our borders. Think I'm lying? Who's the Canadian Prime Minister?

If you said Jacques Chirac, you proved my point.

We're a nation of (mostly) ignorant sheep. We blindly follow a path, not voting for leaders, but voting for parties. Choice A, or Choice B. If you choose Choice C, you're told you're wasting your vote. WTF?!?! Vote for who we're told to, otherwise we're wrong? That's pretty fucked up!

We are mindless, misinformed, naive and unlearned. And what pisses people off is that we admit it with no qualms whatsoever. We make fun of people with accents, even though that person knows 2 languages. His or her english may be rough, but what foreign languages do you know?

That's why (well, one of the reasons) other countries hate us. We impose our will on them without first learning about their cultures. We automatically assume that the USA is the best, and everything else is shit. We're like a giant mass of Jehova's Witnesses, riding our bikes from continent to continent and converting/assimilating/Westernizing everything we come into contact with. We have no respect for anyone but ourselves. That's it in a nutshell.

This is not to say that I am anti-American. Just the opposite, I love my country. We have a lot of great ideals and opportunities. I am a big supporter of the Bill of Rights, and I love the fact that we actually have a piece of paper out there that protects us from our own government (even if there is another bill that essentially makes the first one null and void). One of the reasons we don't spend enough time learning about other countries is because we every type of weather and climate imaginable. We have mountains, oceans, swamps and jungles, deserts and plains. Giant holes in the ground, grandiose mountains reaching to the clouds, geysers and volcanoes, wintery wastelands and tropical getaways. All located and accessable to anyone in this country, no passport required. There's no reason to fly halfway around the world to visit a desert, when you can hop in the car and make a 10 hour drive to Vegas, or Arizona, or California. Why go to Mexico when you can head to California, Florida, Louisiana or Corpus Christi? Hell, you can move to Colorado and experience every type of weather imaginable, all in 1 week. But I am getting off topic.




I am going to be very blunt. IT IS TIME TO MOVE ON. Time to put 9/11 behind us. Time for politicians to quit using that event as the main selling point in their bid for election or re-election. Time to kill the conspiracy theories. No more video or audio tributes, no more television memorials. Nuke the discussion threads, and stop sending me PDF slideshows with pictures of people falling from the towers, and a stupid little message about peace at the end.

Focus on something more uplifting, like the fact that on this day in 1978, we had the final smallpox fatality. I think that's pretty damn great! 9/11, the end of smallpox! Goddam right! 9/11 kicks ass! We sucessfully wiped out a disease that had a 40% mortality rate. A disease whose cure, if the entire United States were innoculated, would kill 72,250 people. An ailment that has killed millions and millions of people all over the world, as early as 1500 BC. It is the only disease eradicated through a concerted and extensive effort that transcended political and ideologic boundaries. Awesome.

Or, if you'd rather have a little more humor, how about the fact that today is the 34th birthday of the Ford Pinto. That's a great story!

"The Ford Pinto was introduced on this day at a cost of less than $2,000, designed to compete with an influx of compact imports. But it was not the Pinto's low cost that grabbed headlines. Ford's new best-selling compact contained a fatal design flaw: because of the placement of the gas tank, the tank was likely to rupture and explode when the car was involved in a rear end collision of over 20mph. In addition, it was eventually revealed that Ford knew about the design flaw before the Pinto was released. An internal cost-benefit analysis prepared by Ford calculated that it would take $11 per car to correct the flaw at a total cost of $137 million for the company. When compared to the lowly estimate of $49.5 million in potential lawsuits from the mistake, the report deemed it "inefficient" to go ahead with the correction. The infamous report assigned a value of $200,000 for each death predicted to result from the flaw. Ford's irresponsibility caused a public uproar, and it 1978, a California jury awarded a record-breaking $128 million to a claimant in the Ford Pinto case."

Johnny Cash, the Man in Black, the Space Coyote himself, departed this planet last year. Peter Tosh wash shot in Jamacia on 1988. Jon Moss of Culture Club was born (Do you really want to hurt me? Umm, yeah, if you keep singing). Speaking of music, in 1962 the Beatles recorded "Love Me Do" and "P.S. I Love You" with Andy White as the drummer. Yep, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 Beatles.

You know what? We should be out celebrating! Today is New Year's Day in Ethiopia! Let's all go get some corn paste and get drunk and sit around, letting flies land on our eyeballs. Or at least recognize Tunisia's Evening of Destiny. How about you call your grandparents and wish them a Happy Grandparent's Day?


Let me tell you what this day now means. It is a way for vendors to hock their shitty "We Remember" merchandise. A way to fill up the television schedule for a day to remind us all how horrible we feel and how mad we are. And to vote W so it doesn't happen again. 9/11 is now a day that overshadows major historical occurences that have taken place over the years. Henry Hudson discovered Manhattan Island! St. John the Baptist was beheaded! In 1814 we defeated the British at the Battle of Lake Champlain, NY. The Dow Jones Industrial Average suffered it's biggest 1-day decline ever. That's not to say that 9/11 wasn't a major historical event, but it wasn't the only thing to happen.

Let me tell you what happened after the Columbine High School shooting in Littleton, CO. The outcasts, the people that were harassed and ridiculed, the ones that were beaten down by the bigger kids when, most likely, all they wanted to do was fit in and become part of the group, came back and went on a murderous rampage, getting even with the pricks that fucked with them one time too many (Remember what I said about that parallel?)

After the original Clement Park Memorial was erected and torn down, and all the flowers were deposited in the trash, and the trees were planted in the park, we talked about it daily in the news. DAILY. 365 straight. 3 months later, interviews with parents and students. 6 months later, more interviews, and a video montage. 9 months later, investigative reports on how things could have been prevented.

We had a huge memorial on the 1 year anniversary. Yes, very sad. Children died. Put some flowers out, plaster a "We ARE Columbine!" bumper sticker on your car. Wipe away a tear. Curse the satanic pot-smoking bowlers and all that.

Year 2: Sad, but not AS sad. Maybe release some footage from the school security cameras, wipe away a tear. Put a "Respect Life" license plate on your Explorer.

Year 3. Fewer news stories, but an occasional lawsuit here and there. No tears, just wipe your nose. Bowling for Columbine brings out the protesters. Brooks Brown is an asshole. Yeah, I said it. Lying cocksucker is profiting off the suffering of others. Watch out for that karma, buddy.

Year 4: Reinterest emerges, as the final students graduate from Columbine. Now there should be no more video montages, right? Right?

Year 5: Nope. 5 YEAR ANNIVERSARY!!! Wipe away a real tear again.

And from then on, it's just little clips and blurbs in the news, Eric Harris' family is selling their house and moving. But it doesn't end there. Now we have the 10, 15 and 20 year anniversaries to look forward to. Here's a knife, let's re-open those wounds!!

And that is what 9/11 will turn into. Another day out of the year where we're required to feel sad. Well, you know what? FUCK THAT! It's over, it happened, let's learn from our mistakes and focus on other, more important things. PLEASE!



Here's something you should ponder. On this date in 1773, Benjamin Franklin wrote "There never was a good war or bad peace." Take that into consideration before the obligatory Osama rants and political diatribes take place. Now I'm going to sit back and let the hate mail roll in.

-tcl (still no signature, wanna make me one?)





Friday, September 10, 2004

Nightmares

Just came across these videos today. They're both by Aphex Twin, and are quite disturbing. "Windowlicker" is over 10 minutes long, but pretty funny, in a twisted sort of way. It starts out like a typical rap video, and then turns into something completely different. And the dance choreography is just hilarious. But the end really frightened me. I hate those damn faces.

"Come to Daddy" is just EVIL. EVIL, I TELLS YA! I saw this video for the first time about 7 years ago, and I was not in the right state of mind to view it. It scared the absolute bejeezus out of me, and if you watch it, you'll see why. Richard D. James has some mental issues, methinks. But what do you expect from someone who lives in a converted bank, owns a submarine and has an armored 1950's tank sitting on his front lawn.

Aphex Twin also has a lot of surprisingly good ambient material as well. You wouldn't think it after hearing "Come to Daddy", but I highly reccomend Selected Ambient Works Vol. 2.

I think that Aphex is one of the most innovative and intelligent artist/producers out there today. He embedded a secret image of his face into his "Windowlicker" EP that can only be viewed with a special sound-to-visual software, Metasynth. He pretty much pioneered IDM (Intelligent Dance Music), and tends to do odd things, like play a live dj set with a turntable needle on sandpaper, and a microphone in a blender.

I won't yak on about him forever, but check out some of his stuff, and if you can find it, read an interview with him (he tends to be reclusive). Good music, but a warped mind.

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

What's the Dilly-o?

Here's another update. It seems I post updates on things I have done to the site more often than I post real items. Ah, well.

First things first, I have started using w.Bloggar. So far, I haven't had any issues with it, and after seeing my work twice nuked because of an accidental click on the "Back" button, it's nice to be able to do things offline and to be able to save things without dealing with the whole "Save as Draft" waitwaitwaitwaitwaitwaitwaitwait BS. So, I'll give w.Bloggar some props. They color code links and html codes, making it really easy to fix things, and the layout is pretty slick as well.

But enough kissing w.Bloggar's ass. I want to say thanks to Aaron B, for hooking up that nifty barcode graphic you see at the top of your screen, as well as a few other pieces that I have yet to put up. Not only did he hook all this up for a measly gmail invite, but he came back 5 days later and tweaked a picture for me. And that was really above and beyond. And much better than all those assholes who have decided to take their invites and run. Don't forget, I have ALL your email addresses, both old and new. I'm giving everyone to the end of the week, and then the spam starts flying into your Inbox. So don't jerk me around, I gave you what you needed. Keep up your end of the deal.

Big thanks also go to kopfschuss, who gave me a signature file. I'll get the rest of my thanks out there in a few days when I get all my work consolidated, so if you hooked me up with something, your kudos are on their way.

Flooble SUCKS. The goddamn server keeps going down, and everytime it does, my blog just LAAAAGS. So, once again I am putting out the request for information. If anyone can reccomend a better tagboard, please let me know. Thinking about Zonkboard, but we'll see.

Gmail invite offer still stands, go here for more information on how you can score one. But please note, since I've been scammed a few times, I'm really losing my patience with those folks who promise, but don't deliver. So don't expect one to just be sent to you. Sucks, but if you have a problem with it, let me know, and I will send you the email addresses of said scammers. Then you can voice your complaints to them.

-tcl

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

Razor Tongue, Frayed Nerves

It's time to update my shit list. Here are the things that are currently aggravating me.

1) People who blast their stereos in their car. I know the saying "If it's too loud, you're too old", but some of you fools are just taking things to an extreme. I don't want to hear what you are playing. 9 times out of 10, the music being blasted in my ear is some shitty Dr. Dre/Ice Cube/Nelly/Jadakiss song that is 40% bleeped out, because once these walking Darwin Awards shell out a grand for a few 12" speakers in the trunk, an amp or two, and a box, they have no money left to buy a CD player to listen to REAL music. Let me give all of you idiots a lesson on proper stereo installation.

i) Do not spend more on your stereo than you did on your car.
ii) Bolt your equipment down! Nothing is worse than the sound of a buzzing and rattling trunk.
iii) Dyna-Mat your interior!!! If you're going to spend the cash for a system, spend the cash to make your system sound GOOD. If you are truely into stereo systems, and know what music is supposed to sound like, then you know that a good setup can only be heard from 5 - 10 feet away, and even then it should be a muffled thump, not a BOOOOMrattttleshake, which is the sound of your muffler coming loose.
iv) You're a real retard if you go thumping through the parking lot of your apartment/place of business. Especially if your stereo is at top volume, and you have "Jensen" and "Bose" stickers all over your windows. You're a walking advertisement for theft. Hopefully the person who steals your shit will have more common sense than you do.

Lots of bass does NOT make you gangsta, no matter how loud it is. It will only do one of the following:
Make you deaf
Make you blind (the vibrations detatch your retinas)
Collapse a lung.

But go ahead and continue thumping away like a moron. The high-school kids will envy you, and everyone else will think you're a tool. And that's what you REALLY want, isn't it?


2) Plz and ppl. I really dislike these abbreviations, and if you are too lazy to insert vowels in your words, then I don't have the time to answer back, or reply to your horribly constructed emails. You're lazy, you're stupid and I refuse to converse with anyone who "tlks lyk ths". Keep your text messaging for the phone. Learn the ENTIRE word before typing or writing it. Rtrds.

3) Geese. I almost killed a few today in my Jeep, and that would have made me feel bad. But I refuse to swerve out of the way, because I'm not going to roll my vehicle just to save the life of an animal that, for some unknown reason, decides to sit down in the middle of a busy street, right after the offramp from an interstate highway. Fucking birds.

5) Stupid tattoos. Someone at work just got a new tattoo. An evil skull with a pretty pink bow tie. On the back of her neck. What can I say about this? I love tattoos, and am the proud owner of a few, but they're all GOOD tattoos. Not bullshit like happy flowers, sluttoos or Colorado Avalanche logos. She's already bitching that she wishes she could see it.

6) My Weekend! Leave it alone!! I only get 2 days a week to myself, and out of those 2 days, my "alone time" doesn't start until after 1pm. Cut me some slack! I have shit I want to do, too! Stop bothering me! Raahhh!#@#@!

7) Banks. I was without an account for 3 years, because I kept getting screwed by Commercial Federal and 1st Bank. Money would disappear for no reason, and they wouldn't let me withdraw MY money when I wanted to. So I switched to ACE. Yeah, they take 20 bucks out of each check, but at least I had my money in hand, and I knew that it would be accessable at all times. So finally, after 36 months, I decide to give a bank another try. And what do they do? They send my checks and ATM card to the wrong address. I still have yet to see them. So I have no way of withdrawing money from an ATM, and I can't write checks or use my card for paying bills. Meanwhile, someone is out running around with my personal information and ATM card. Fucking hell.

That's it for now, it's time to go home. Bleah.

-tcl
(I'll have a signature soon. Maybe. Goddam lying gmail traders.)


Thursday, September 02, 2004

The Great Gmail Trading Post

Ok, so I am addicted to trading these things. I've already traded for some GREAT art (I'll put up my thank you's in another post), as well as some other fun stuff, like magazine subscriptions and some great music from Brazil. I think over the past 3 days I have hooked up 30+ Farkers, as well as some folks at Gmailswap, and I have no intention of stopping until I am completely out. Every evening I get rid of all my invites, and around midnight Google refills my accounts, so I am making the following offer:

I will give a gmail invite to anyone that can fulfill 1 (just one!) of the following requirements:

1) Make a logo for my band, Twist (which is an acronym for The Way I See Things). I'd like to have something that incorporates an eye into the logo/picture somewhere.

2) Make some art for this site, Convoluted Insanity. Just match the color scheme I have going.

3) Make a logo or header for my business, Ferret Frenzy. Let me know if I can give you ideas.

4) Make a signature file, or a graphic that I can use as a signature, for The Cunning Linguist.

5) Give me some HTML tips and tricks, as I am in the process of teaching myself, and could use any helpful advice.

5) Are you from Colorado? A Jeeper? A Musician? A Pot Smoker? Prove it to me, and I'll hook you up.


There you have it. I will not accept emails from people who do nothing more than say "gmail plz" or something stupid and un-original like that. I had to work to get my invites 2 months ago by trading and shipping items to folks all over the US and Canada (yes, I actually traded tangible items with monetary value), so the least you can do is put a bit of time into your requests. And think of it this way. If you do art for me, not only will you get an invite, but your work will be either posted on one of my sites for all to see, or on a sticker used to promote my band. Hell, if you want, I'll even create a link to your site on this blog, that way if you are a freelance artist, you can get some exposure.

Post in the comment section of this thread, start some convo in the chatterbox, or shoot me an email..... Help me help you!

Good Luck!

-tcl

Tinfoil Hat

Put on your tinfoil hat! Here's a new 9/11 conspiracy theory for you: The plane that hit the Pentagon wasn't really a plane at all, but a missile. Or a smaller jet.

Here's what Snopes has to say about it:

My personal opinion?

Well, first of all, if it wasn't the plane that crashed into the Pentagon, then where exactly did flight 77 disappear to? Did the US Government crash it into the Bermuda Triangle or something? I am just as distrustful of our government as the next person, but in order for a conspiracy theory to work, you need to not only have a theory about what did or did not occur, but about WHO did it. This site gives no answers, just asks questions. If a different flight hit the building, where did it come from, and who was on it? If it was a missile, who fired it, and where did they fire it from? Why was the video from the parking lot, the highway, or the surrounding buildings confiscated by the FBI and never released? Ummm... because when a plane (or missle, or Ford Pinto) smashes into a government building that houses an agency that deals with TOP SECRET INFORMATION, you probably don't want to show too much detail. Remember the gigantic paperstorm that came out of the WTC when the planes hit? Well, the content of the paper in the Pentagon (I am guessing) is much more sensitive than bank statements and menus from Windows on the World.

I've seen shows on the Discovery Channel about how the NSA shreds and re-shreds their documents, and then once they're turned into powder, they're sold to companies that make toilet paper and tissue paper. They filmed the conveyer belt and shredder as the documents were going in for their 3rd pass, and the images were STILL blurred out. You don't want to take any chances. So wouldn't it make sense that not every single detail was released about the CIA hit?

After the "Let's Roll" theory about some sort of pod attached to the underside of Flight 175 (which crashed into WTC2), I find it hard to believe these claims. You can make seismic charts, slow down video to hundredths of a second, show different heat signatures, and post poorly edited video from a Czech News Crew that was hovering nearby when the second plane hit (funny how the person in the foreground of the video is able to change outfits in a matter of seconds). The same people who do this have theories that the devil's face was visible in the fire and smoke.

At the very least, the video is interesting. It makes a few credible points and observations (such as the backwash from the engines), but for the most part, it's speculation. And putting the soundtrack for "Fight Club" behind it doesn't really add credibility.

Thoughts or objections? I'm currently reading "Inside 9/11: What REALLY happened", which is a pretty in depth account of all the hijackers (from Wal-Mart reciepts to bank transactions, fights they got into in bars, porn movies rented at motels, and many other things), and I would recommend it to anyone interested in finding out more about what happened 3 years ago.



Song that is stuck in my head today:

"Who knows what tomorrow will bring/Maybe sunshine, maybe rain/But for me it's still the same / Maybe it'll bring my love to me"

-RJD2 "Smoke and Mirrors". Original Sample by Timothy Mark.




Wednesday, September 01, 2004


The sun is setting over the Rocky Mountains. Downtown Denver is just to the right. Posted by Hello

I am frightened... yet strangely aroused.

Every so often, I hit the Next Blog button at the top right of the screen (No, Blogger is not paying me to say this. But if they wanted to.......), and I come across some strange things. Sometimes I get a bunch of Brazillian or Peruvian sites in a large clump, and the occasional Christian Teenager shows up every so often. But today I found THIS. And I laughed my ASS off!
The posts start here.

Here's my favorite out of the sequence:


"Wrinkles likes his poon and jam!"

So, Virginia of Newfoundland and Labrador, Canada; You get to be my link of the day. I don't actually have a "Link of the Day" section on here, but all the same, the title is yours. I had a real crappy day, and that lightened me right up. I knew Canadians had a sense of humor. It's just buried under all those sweaters.

And to Chris, Virginia's boyfriend:




-tcl

Franken goes nuts

I'd like to find the story that accompanies these pics from the RNC.



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